Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
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