don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Randomize