eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
