As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
