Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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