No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
