Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (669): View more from California

  I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (669): I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation. http://tfl.nu/imft
  Replies (10) Good night (1333) Bad night (979)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (253): she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't http://tfl.nu/jem5
  Replies (5) Good night (2424) Bad night (737)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (530): I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS http://tfl.nu/jjgj
  Replies (36) Good night (5129) Bad night (1567)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high. http://tfl.nu/38z6
  Replies (24) Good night (4466) Bad night (1129)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel. http://tfl.nu/te56
  Replies (10) Good night (6849) Bad night (1202)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?

  (1-954): View more from Florida

  Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (954): tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"? (1-954): Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards. http://tfl.nu/k91c
  Replies (72) Good night (11049) Bad night (1577)
• Favorite

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (270): There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time http://tfl.nu/e9de
  Replies (12) Good night (981) Bad night (6069)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody. http://tfl.nu/l0aj
  Replies (7) Good night (3392) Bad night (884)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-) http://tfl.nu/n299
  Replies (8) Good night (2043) Bad night (674)
• Favorite

  (712): View more from Iowa

  That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (712): That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time" http://tfl.nu/be6i
  Replies (11) Good night (4499) Bad night (804)
• Favorite

  (971): View more from Oregon

  Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (971): Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love. http://tfl.nu/5pup
  Replies (6) Good night (1083) Bad night (528)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (770): Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week http://tfl.nu/af2g
  Replies (1) Good night (818) Bad night (340)
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (240): How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat http://tfl.nu/bfcr
  Replies (4) Good night (502) Bad night (603)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this. http://tfl.nu/75ao
  Replies (4) Good night (407) Bad night (586)
• Favorite

  (985): View more from Louisiana

  Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (985): Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it. http://tfl.nu/i5dn
  Replies (1) Good night (374) Bad night (593)

Randomize