no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize
