then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Randomize