This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
he was CRYING into my vagina
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
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