I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize