And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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