Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
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Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
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I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow