I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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