I have demons in me.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Is Oprah even human
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize