So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I just gift wrapped bread.
no you cant smoke seaweed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
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