I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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