she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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