a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
