he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
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