You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
