5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
