high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
