Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(702): View more from Nevada

I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore

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(623): View more from Arizona

I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.

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(316): View more from Kansas

Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.

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(310): View more from California

Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs

(310): View more from California

Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?

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19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(410): View more from Maryland

Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.

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(559): View more from California

I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.

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(270): View more from Kentucky

my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy

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(647): View more from Ontario

you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'

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(732): View more from New Jersey

I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back

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