I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
It was like getting head from an anaconda
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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