This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
