so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
