He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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