Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
