OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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