What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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