I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
