Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
