Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
