I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
did i just pee glitter
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
