Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
Four minutes until I can fart!
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
