we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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