you guys were way drunker than both of me
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
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My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
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