his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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