she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
