Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
