its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Success! We fucked roommates!
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
