he wants to bone in the snuggie
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize