I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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