I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
