You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
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