im so drunk with asians
where?
always
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Randomize
