So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.