my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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