I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Randomize
