Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize